What happens when nobody is looking...

(alternately titled: Sticker Shock)

Give these guys 10 minutes and 100 stickers and watch out!

Note to Self

Just because it sounds like your 4 year old son in cussing like a sailor in the back of your car doesn't necessarily mean that is the case.

The other day on the way home from school I thought I heard Evan saying f*** then s*** over and over. Jake and I looked at each other like noooo it can't be our sweet little boy with such an awful potty mouth. Just as we were about to question Evan on where he learned such language it became very clear to us what he was trying to say. He was sounding out the word function. Why was he trying to say the word function? Not sure, but at that point I really didn't care, I was just glad that my little boy didn't have a mouth like a biker!

Imagination

Today Evan and Zachary had a very full and busy day. They hosted a birthday party. And let me tell you they were hands on with the preparations. They blew up the balloons and baked the cake (chocolate chip pancake flavor - of course!). Unfortunately the party came to an abrupt end when space aliens came and blew up the cake - I hate it when that happens.

Out of the Mouths of Babes

I think one of my favorite things about my kids are the little things they do to make me laugh. Whether it's a silly question they pose or the mispronunciation of a word I find it both endearing and down right funny. Here's a recent conversation I had with Evan while we were both home sick sitting in the chair together:

Evan: What do bunnies eat?
Me: Carrots.
Evan: OK. What do camels eat?
Me: Umm....straw?
Evan: They eat strawberries.
Me: Ok, if you say so.
Evan: I know what cows eat, cows eat cud. I love cud!

This had me rolling. You probably had to be there, but the way he said it was hilarious. I had no idea that he even new what cud was.

Here are some "Zachisms":

smooky = spooky (When Zach looks in a dark room he will often say that it looks smooky in there)
He is always telling us "that's enough, guys, that's enough" when he feels something has gone on too long.
He is also not afraid to tell anyone that he is "tired of this" when something in his little world is not going as planned. I love his spunk.

Roger

Evan has a new friend, his name is Roger. What we do know about Roger is that he has brown hair and is taller than Evan. What we didn't know until just the other day is that he is also imaginary.

The other night Jake and I got to officially "meet" Roger. He "came over" to play about 10 times the other night. About every other minute we could hear Evan say "ding dong" and then announce that Roger was here. They would play for a minute or so and then Evan would look at his video watch (yes, also imaginary) and say that it was time for Roger to go home. Before we knew it, Roger was at the door again for another play date. This went on for close to an hour.

I don't recall having an imaginary friend as a child so I find this really fascinating and kind of fun. Evan will talk and play with him as if he were really there and he even formally introduced us to him. Evan called Roger in from the other room and said "Roger, come here I would like you to meet my mom and dad." It was really cute. I can only hope that he will be this polite when we get to meet one of his real friends!

Kiss my...

So the other night while the boys and I were watching "So You Think You Can Dance" (my all time favorite show) Zachary and Evan were showing off their dancing skills (really just running and spinning) when Zach did an amazing rolling spin move off the couch and fell on his bottom. Of course the floor was covered in a blanket of about 100 assorted cars and planes leaving him a great big pain in his...uh hem, you know what. Zachary promptly came over to me and requested that I make it all better. He crawled up into my lap, stood up, turned around, bent over and said "Mommy, kiss my butt. Please, kiss my butt."

Evan, who loves a good bodily function joke, picked up on the humor of the situation right away and joined his brother in asking me to kiss his butt as well. I really thought I was going to get away without these kind of comments from my kids until at least their teenage years.

Trains and Racecars

Last night my boys and I were playing a game of chase in the back yard. Evan was a train and he wanted me to be a race car. Evan then told Zachary that he could be the "rolling thing on the track". I asked Evan what exactly the "rolling thing" does, so that I could give Zachary some sort of direction as to what his role was to be in this game. Evan quickly said "nothing, the rolling thing does nothing". Oh what fun Zachary will have! I was so happy to see that my son was already so adept at "politely" excluding people from his games by tricking them into thinking they had a role when in fact, they were to do nothing. How brilliant!

However, Zachary was much smarter than Evan had surmised and was not going to fall victim to his evil plot. He realized right away that this role was in no way going to be fun. Shortly there after a fight ensued and both boys were wrestling and rolling down the hill ending the game for all.

Moral of the story: Be more creative when coming up with fictitious roles for games.

What the...

The other day my boys came home from school and I soon heard them running around the house repeating the phrase "what the heck". I was none too happy to hear them speaking like this. Jake and I discussed where on earth they could have possibly heard such a phrase since we are the "perfect parents" and it certainly couldn't have been from either one of us. We came to an agreement (rather quickly) that they must have learned it at school.

Of course, school! That's where they have learned every single bad behavior that they have ever displayed, because obviously we couldn't be at fault. Right? We conjectured that someone else's child must be the one who put this phrase in their heads. Mystery solved! Or so we thought. . .

Last night as we were heading home from school I turned down the street heading to our house only to come upon a huge back up of cars. I knew I was stuck and could be there for quite a while. Immediately, without thinking the phrase "what the heck" came out of my mouth. I couldn't believe it, I was to blame. Me. ME! I started wondering how many other things I was to blame for that, up until this point, I was blaming on the poor, innocent classmates of my boys (OK, well not so innocent).

Then I heard Evan pipe up from the back seat. "Mom, you don't say words like that. That's a bad word. You need to say only nice words. You need to call Daddy." I'd been caught, and scolded by my three year old none the less.

Oh well, what the heck...nobody's perfect!

Another Conversation with Evan

Me: Evan please don't forget to flush the toilet after you go to the bathroom.

Evan: But mom I don't have to flush today. I only have to flush on Sundays. You flush on Wednesdays.

Don't ask me where he got this idea. Although, it might help conserve water I don't think it's exactly sanitary or what anybody had in mind when they suggested going green.

On a side note: I realize I seem very partial to Evan in my last few posts it's just that Zachary hasn't said anything funny recently. Scratch that, he probably has I just couldn't understand him. I'm working on my translating skills. Hopefully there will be more to come from him soon.

Conversation with Evan

Evan: Mommy I'm hungry.

Me: I'm making dinner right now, it will be ready soon.

Evan: Can I have butter jelly?

Me: No, I'm making sloppy joes. They're yummy, you will like them.

Evan: But I don't like jokey dopes.

Me: How do you know, you've never even tried them. (I'm thinking well, I've never tried "jokey dopes" either) Evan, try saying s...s...sloppy joe.

Evan: sss...jokey dopes!

Me: Close enough, you'll still like them.

And by the way he did end up liking his "jokey dopes". Zach on the other hand wouldn't even try them plus his once perfect pronunciation of sloppy joe turned into jokey dopes by the end of dinner after hearing Evan say it so much. What can I say, I tried.